Sunday, August 13, 2006

Robot Breast Missiles

Classyandfancy, a friend of mine and one hell of a blogger, uses this picture for her blog profile. She picked it because she likes pandas, but I pointed out to her that the wings look like Tranzor Z’s. She, of course, had no idea what the hell I was talking about, and to her credit few do. However, as it turns out, the picture IS Tranzor Z related in that the character is called Panda Z, or something like that, and he is based on the robot character made famous, or somewhat famous anyway, from the cartoon and toy from my youth.

This led me to hark back to the Tranzor Z toy and the lucky friends of mine who had him. He stood about three feet tall, and he shot missiles from his fingers. Then I started to think about the girl robot in the cartoon who shot missiles from her boobies. I did a little research, and found these pictures, since I had to see for myself that my twisted little brain didn’t conjure up this unique form of attack. Sure enough, her name was Aphrodite, and as the picture below will prove, she DID in fact shoot titty missiles. Aphrodite the goddess was a all about love and beauty, but this robot was all about blowing shit up with her tits.

Then I discovered that there is a top-secret plan, so don’t tell anyone, to resolve all conflicts in the Middle East. At this very moment, our fine and wise president, Mr. George W. Bush, has his finger on a button that will unleash a giant Aphrodite robot upon Iraq and all the surrounding countries. She will then discharge a bevy of mammary missiles that will nuke the whole region of the globe back to the Stone Age. Most of these nations will not only hate that they are getting attacked by a giant robot, but the fact that she is scantily clad will be a form of cultural genocide. I mean, never mind the fact that her breasts are weapons, but she is showing her ANKLES! With just the right titty trajectory, spraying her fun bags of fury will in one fell swoop not only resolve all conflicts in the Middle East, but it will lower gas prices, balance the budget, find Nicole Brown Simpson’s “real” killer, and Christopher Reeves will come back from the dead and walk again. Now those are some magic titties.

10 comments:

Cherry Ride said...

How did I miss this cartoon? Between this and Classy/Fancy's post about "Old Country Buffet" I feel like I've lived under a rock.

classyandfancy said...

One wonders what weapons Aphrodite's nether-regions contain. I think she might spew anthrax or the bubonic plague from her unmentionables. Now THAT would be a sight to behold.

Cherry-Don't feel too bad about not knowing about the obscure cultural references, but I am beginning to think that you share a lot in common with Gollum.

Steph said...

Oh how i wish my boobs could do that.
I'd make the streets safe for all, yes i would.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Cherry: Classy and I are expanding your horizons.

Classy: Yeah, I would imagine her other naughty parts had equally magical powers.

Steph: Steph, get to work on that. You will be the talk of the town, the bee's knees, and the cat's pajama's.

Roxana said...

"She will then discharge a bevy of mammary missiles ..."

That's poetry.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Thanks, Rox, and thanks for coming by!

Bobby said...

Wow Ken...I thought the EXACT same thing you did. I was afraid that my own sick little mind had imagined the whole "booby missles" part. I've asked everyone I know if they remember it and they look at me like i'm nuts.Thanks for confirming this, and for the picture!

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

She had boob missiles, and that's a fact.

Clinton said...

i thought that it was a movie too.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

A Tranzor Z movie? I think you're right. The kid rode in a car that landed in the robot's head, and then they'd go kick ass together.