Monday, May 28, 2012

Binge Drinking Recap #325

So yesterday I met HLP, his wife, and their baby out at a very hot and humid Chicago street festival nearby.  I'm really happy for him because I can tell he is totally content.  You know why?  He walks around a festival with tons of hot chicks around with a burp cloth on his shoulder, and when I point it out, he just leaves it there.  He had to go home, but luckily I bumped into some other friends, and Oats came out. 


We ended up at a random Lincoln Park bar because we thought they did karaoke.  Turns out they didn't, but everyone was smiling and we had a good vibe, so we just stuck around.  I like those bars where everyone talks to each other.  It didn't have those huge wolf packs of girls that only want to talk to each other.  One woman was there in a toga.  I mean, it was a really fancy toga, but still a toga.  Her friend said she picked her up and was like, "Okay.  A toga."  She was really nutty, so she kind of pulled it off.  She was nice too, but that didn't stop me from calling her the Iron Sheik and quoting Julius Caesar with an over exaggerated Charlton Heston voice. 

I then achieved a level of drunkenness where the Michael Jackson jokes just started flowing out of me.  That's a good level.  For me at least. 

8 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

I've always found it strange that single sex groups hang out in bars. It suggests a lack of flirting skills. Shouldn't that be "vixen pack"?

sybil law said...

Sounds like an excellent night to me!!

Henrietta Collins (aka Kage) said...

was she wearing panties under her toga?

why was that the first thing that came to my mind?

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Gorilla: Yes. And why do hot women all hang out with hot women? To me that says that they are shallow and superficial. To me, if someone is a good friend and makes me laugh, that's what matters. If a chick is hot and only hangs out with hot broads, watch out.

Sybil: It was a solid night, but I need another couple days to sleep it off.

Henrietta: Excellent question. I'm thinking no. She seemed the type.

justmakingconvo.com said...

When I'm drunk, I tend to quote Julius Caesar with an over exaggerated Michael Jackson voice.

Which is probably why most nights I end up drinking alone...

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Justmaking: Oooh. That would be really creepy, especially because he would be delivering soliloquy to a kid.

The Constant Complainer said...

First-time visitor from Cleveland, OH. Saw a comment you made on Cocaine Princess' blog and decided to click through.

Glad I stopped by. Always looking for new blogs to check out. And reading this made me try to think of some new Michael Jackson jokes too. LOL.

Cool blog. I'll stop back.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

complainer: thanks much for the kind words and for coming by. i'll be sure to pay you a visit right back. perhaps we can exchange tasteless m.j. jokes some day.