I have been putting off a lot of things because I'm moving in a couple weeks. I'm not buying a lot of groceries and I'm not ordering anything to this apartment, which means I haven't ordered a new book to read. A friend was over and gave me back my copy of "High Fidelity" by Nick Honrny, and while I am not even sure it is, in fact, my copy, I decided to give it another read.
It's still a very funny and insightful book, but I can't fully relate to Rob, the protagonist, anymore. There was a time, not long after I read it, where I was him, and most people who knew me would agree. I was way too interested in rock music to a snobbish degree, I actually worked in a record store for a long time, and I got miserable over failed relationships and played sad songs until I cried.
I'm not that guy anymore. I'm not Rob!
Even the last relationship I got out of, I was really hurt (even if it was painfully obvious to everyone around me that it was the wrong woman for me), but I bounced back beautifully. I took all the right steps: Never called her again, cut off all mutual friends, work out like an animal, and got right back into the game with other women to feel good again as quickly as possible.
What I did 5 years prior was more like what Rob would have done: Wallow in self pitty spinning Smiths records, keep trying to figure out what went wrong, feel inadequate about myself in every way imaginable, and let it affect my personal and professional life to a marked degree.
Now look at me. I'm getting my own place with the woman I love, leaving this frat house with the four roommates behind, I love my job and it's going great, I'm staying in shape - and at 35-years-old (the same age as Rob in the book), I'm finally an adult. I should have been this guy when I was 27, but I have no regrets. I grew up one way or another and I've had this blog full of goofy tales to mark my progress, albeit a slow process. Thanks for reading those of you who have been along for the ride, and expect more grown-up style writing to come and some goofy stuff too . . . I still gotta be me!