Saturday, January 31, 2015

The other night I met a friend of mine out for an adult pizza party with adult beverages, and I excused myself to use the little boys' room to wash my hands.  After getting done washing my hands I was thinking . . .

"Shit, just got done washing my hands, but now I gotta pee.  Terrible.  Okay, let's get it done.  Okay, done.  Do I really need to wash my hands if I just washed them a second ago?  Yeah, I do because I just handled my pecker.  You can't walk out there with dirty-dick hands and start man-handling all that pizza like a damn savage.  What's wrong with you, Ken?  Okay, we'll just wash 'em again."

It was then that I realized I wasn't thinking that stuff.  I had said it all out loud.  And there was a closed stall with shoes down there who belonged to a guy who heard my whole hand washing and penis touching conversation with myself.

Quit touching yourself, Blog Buddies, and get commenting.  How is everyone doing this fine evening?  

3 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

Not so bad, Dr Ken, just think all of the worse things you could have said aloud! Is an "adult pizza party" one where you watch pizza porn? I remember a blog post about men sticking their dicks through pizzas and getting blowjobs.

Fredulous Yo said...

I talk to myself too. A lot. Most of my best ideas come from conversations I have with myself. I'm the only person that really gets me.

Kenneth Noisewater said...

Gorilla: I'm sad to say I have seen that site. A fun premise, but I'm always worrying those guys will burn their wangs on that hot cheese.

Fred: That's true. But do you ever get sick of yourself when you're talking to yourself all day? That's a whole new level of self-loathing, but it does motivate me to get out and talk to other people besides myself.