Monday, November 25, 2013

The GF and I came home drunk on Friday night, and we both wanted to watch a movie.  She popped in "Aladdin," which wouldn't have been my vote, but I'm glad I watched it again because it's still funny, the songs are good, and overall it just holds up well.  Robin Williams could probably have done the performance with 10 less impressions of celebrities that have nothing to do with anything, but beyond that, it's a good time.  The two of us actually sang all the songs loudly, so sorry neighbors.  We actually went into an impromptu a capella "Little Mermaid" song quite loudly, so I'm even more sorry about that.  But yeah, we nailed it.

Also, I have a confession: Back in high school, I was insanely jealous of Aladdin.  Why, you may ask?

Great minds dress alike.
1. He Has a Pet Monkey.  I have always wanted a pet monkey.  Yes, I know that they don't usually make good pets, and sometimes they rip your arm out of its socket or eat all the flesh off of your face, but they're just so darned cute.  Mine would for sure wear the little outfit like Abu, and he would definitely be perched up on my shoulder all the time, turning back flips every now and again, maybe right when I get off a good one-liner, just before I make a dramatic exit . . .



2. He Has a Hot, Exotic-looking Girlfriend With a Perfect (If Not Impossible) Body, and Giant Pretty Eyes.  And she's rich and doesn't dig rich guys.  Back in high school when I was watching this movie, she didn't really need to be any of these things.  Simply being not animated, having a pulse, and willing to sleep with a dork like me would have worked out great.
I don't remember her wearing this

3. The Son of a Bitch Has His Own Flying Carpet.*  Whenever I'm flying through my own powers in a dream, it's the coolest thing ever, and there is this feeling of complete control.  I would say I have had this dream around three times, and it's always incredible.  I'm pissed when I wake up because I know the dream is over and I can't really fly.  The ability to fly would be outstanding.  I could bypass a traffic jam, and then just wrap the carpet around my neck like a scarf and head into my business meting (or more likely the bar).  That or I would stuff it in a brief case so that I look important.  Any way you slice it, I want one of those things.

Okay.  I'm still jealous of that punk.  That street rat . . .

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How about you, readers?  You ever get jealous of a cartoon?  Roger Rabbit also comes to mind.  I was always funny as a kid but couldn't seem to land the giant chested songstress type . . . 

*You will notice that having the magic lamp is not on the list.  I have just seen too many problems with the whole wish thing in all the movies.  He can keep it.  

5 comments:

David Oliver said...

I'm with you on the flying thing. I'll take anything that flies but I really want a winged horse. Would be so cool. Well, cold and wet right now as we've got a "winter mix" outside. :(
I guess carrying an umbrella while riding a winged horse would kind of kill the effect...

Anyway, my youngest kid always wanted a pet monkey. Not desperately, but he wanted one. He has baby now. I'll have to ask if he still wants a monkey.

Gorilla Bananas said...

So you've had a flying carpet dream! You remind me of 'The Dude' in the Big Lebowski. Maybe you're like him in another ways too. A pet chimp would be more fun than a pet monkey. I suppose I might accept Aladdin's girlfriend as a pet human.

Kenneth Noisewater said...

David: Having a child has got to be a life changing event and probably it has changed your son's life all together. That being said, I'm sure he still wants the monkey.

Gorilla: Sadly, I'm a lot like The Dude. As a matter of fact, I'm bringing my check book to go buy a gallon of milk. Also, a gorilla with a pet human princess would be awesome. Make that happen.

Soda and Candy said...

YES monkey butlers FTW. I don't remember ever being jealous of a cartoon but because we have kids we're watching all the Disney movies again and I think I'd like to go drinking with Ursula the Sea Witch, she is awesome.

Kenneth Noisewater said...

Soda: Yeah. Me and Ursula could get in some trouble. I thought she was hot as the brunette human chick. Always have been partial to brunettes. Thanks for coming by. I'll return the favor.