Wednesday, February 12, 2014

I wanted to tell a story that a friend told me once and share it with you all because it's really funny, but first I had to check a few things:

A) Have I already told it?

No.  I ran a search of couple of key words, such as couch, and surprisingly I haven't put this one down yet.  

B) Does the friend and story teller have a name that I have assigned him on my blog that I should use?

No.  But this triggered me finding a bunch of other people I have given blog monikers, some of which have had inconsistent spellings, wording, or all together different names over the years.  So then I spent the better part of an hour going around making the names of these dudes (read drinking buddies) consistent.  I then created a word document that I can reference in the future to avoid any more mishaps.  Turns out that I have at least 16 people with blog names, and some of these folks I really need to reconnect with.  

Anyway  

On with the story . . .

This friend of mine told me a story about a time he got lucky one night and took a young lady from the bar back to his Lakeview apartment.  They started fooling around on the couch, and soon their clothes were mostly off.  They were in a position in which he was sitting on the couch facing into the living room, and she was riding him on top facing the wall.  Suddenly, my friend becomes aware that she is magically tickling his bean bag somehow, but why was her hand so soft?  And so wet?  He then looked back to find that his dog was lapping away at his balls.  He laughed, shooed him away, and was kind enough to tell his good buddies this heart warming/ball warming story.  I hope you enjoyed this tale as much as I did, but somehow I doubt that is even possible.

8 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

That's a loyal dog for you. He could have licked the woman's butt crack, but he chose his master's balls. Beautiful story.

David Oliver said...

No doubt to keep from being considered a perv he would have to shoo the dog away. More's the pity. I would think a magical tickling of your bean bag could not be easily procured.

Jimmy Fungus said...

Wow, you realize what this means? If your buddy gets lonely and drunk enough one night, his pooch might start looking more appealing to him...

JerseySjov said...

man's best friend... all my cats would ever do was sit on the windowsill and stare, unblinking, at the action on the bed/couch/floor.

Mr. Shife said...

Too funny. Hope he gave his dog an extra treat or two for taking man's best friend to a whole new level. Tank and I definitely do not need to get this intimate. Good story, Dr. Ken. Have a great weekend.

Kenneth Noisewater said...

Gorilla: Very true. I love how you have that animal mentality take on matters such as these.

David: Yeah, if you let that go for more than 5 seconds, you are venturing into dangerous beastiality territory.

Jimmy: Yessir. I should have went over to his apartment and hid the peanut butter.

Jov; Yes, in your college days they would have gotten an eye full from what I remember reading. Good to see you back on my comments. I'll have to stop by and see if you have been updating.

Shife: Basset hounds are the most generous lovers in the canine community from what I have been told. It's because they really take. Their. Time.

justmakingconvo.com said...

This is exactly why I don't have a dog.

...Or balls.

Kenneth Noisewater said...

Convo: Hahaha. Dogs will officially lick anything.