Monday, January 15, 2007

The Gull-Darn Zombies Are Back!

I recently did a post in which I complained about people who talk about dreams they've had, and then, of course, proceeded to tell my readers about a dream. Now I'm going to tell you about, yet another, dream. Boy, it's like saying I hate when people whistle, and then whistling the theme from the Andy Griffith Show, loudly, right into your ear, from one inch away.

The other night I had one of those really long dreams, that's really a series of dreams with one common theme, this one being zombies. Those lovable, rotting, undead fellas are always popping up in my dreams, and I must admit, I have had a long, love affair with them ,and even did a post about it. I wonder what the zombies in my dreams signify? I'll have to ask one the next time I dream about one, just before he bites my neck and slurps up my entrails like fettuccine. I spent a good while running away from zombies in this particular dream, and clobbering the heads of others with various blunt objects. During zombie-free period I was stopping off at my girlfriend's house, which is when I knew I was dreaming, since I don't have one, but before I could get into her suburban (which is another sign it was a dream) house I was stopped by a girl I used to sort of date. She was sexy as hell when I knew her, but she seemed to go in and out of liking me, which of course made her really appealing. I know, I'm screwed up, but that's for another blog.

So, in the dream she was visiting her boyfriend, and we got talking about how neither of us were too into our respective partners. She said to me, "So, you're taking out some lucky, young lady," to which I responded, very suave-like I might add, "I hope I'm looking at the lucky, young lady I'm taking out this evening." What a pimp-daddy, right? We made plans to meet up later, and I remember thinking about whether I should take her out for dinner or just a drink, and which fine, Chicago establishment should I take her to? Next I remember thinking, "Shit, would if the zombies are out tonight! The gull-darn zombies are back!"

A possible interpretation for this dream:
I'm never able to commit to a relationship, and even when I'm ready to, external factors, like zombies, always get in the way.

22 comments:

Roxana said...

Hhm, I looked up "zombie" in a dream dictionary. Sorry, but the interpretation isn't very good:

"Zombie -

To see or dream that you are a zombie, suggests that you are physically and/or emotionally detached from people and situations that are currently surrounding you. You are feeling out of touch. Alternatively, it may indicate that you are feeling dead inside and are simply going through the motions of daily living."

So, uh ... good luck with that.

Roxana said...

Oh wait, this doesn't apply to you at all. YOU weren't a zombie in the dream. OTHER PEOPLE were zombies. Phew. I was worried about you for a minute. My bad.

NAME: Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

You had me worried too! I guess I have a fear of a bunch of OTHER detached, dead-inside people.

Mood Indigo said...

wow - my issues with ex-girlfriend's really pale in comparison to the threat of zombies...

Jay said...

What's worrying me is that while you're trying to save your girlfriend from zombies, you're also arranging -- behind her back -- dates with your ex. While she is in mortal peril, no less.

But just what is it with zombies lately?

Katie in the UK said...

On a completely related note, have you seen Shaun of the Dead? Excellent zombie movie (in a zombie's are funny, not scary, kind of way)

classyandfancy said...

Suave pimp daddy zombie killing dude should be part of your profile. Oh yeah, and that you like puppies, Mr. Mister, and love it when people misspell things.

Also, that zombie in the pic is pretty cute. Is he taken?

The [Cherry] Ride said...

Great, now tonight I'm probably going to have a dream about zombies. Thanks.

NAME: Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Mood: Don't worry Mood. They're dumb and slow moving, the zombies I mean, not my ex's.

Jay: No, it was during downtime from zombies. There was no immediate threat. I was taking five.

Katie: I love me some Shawn of the Dead. I've seen ALL the zombie flicks equally. I Can't choose one. It's like choosing between my children, if I had children.

Classy: "Suave, zombie-killing, pimp-daddy!" Has a nice ring to it.

Cherry: If you come across one in a dream, just remember, you have to take out the brain. Use a frying pan if you have to.

Mr Shife said...

Well as long as you don't have a dream about crabs then you are OK. I heard that if you dream about crabs then it means you are superhero gay.

darci ann said...

ok, honestly - and I will make my roommate log on to validate this - but I regularly have crazy zombie dreams!! Several times a month I have long, in-depth dreams of this nature, typically of the running, fighting off zombie nature, which generally involves some death blows and strategic, secret trips out for supplies from a well designed, protected safe house (single point of entry, no windows on main floor) for me and a couple of my closest friends. Of course, this drives me to see all of the zombie movies, which in their own unique way provide new and interesting ideas and information about zombie management.

I am in shock and will have to return at a later time. I'm a little relieved and weirded out that I am not alone in zombie-dream fest.

Amy said...

Sadly, Darci is not lying. I am regularly getting zombie dream updates from her...they mostly vary location wise...can't believe that there is another person with the same type of dreams.

Drunken Chud said...

here's what this dream tells me: you crave female acceptance, however, your emotions are mindless meandering things that you can't seem to control. you try, but they surge on you and overwhelm and you have to run, and fight. you never seem to know which way to go because you can't rein in or even organize your feelings. hence the constant struggle. then again, as freud so eloquently put it, "sometimes a cigar, is just a cigar."

NAME: Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Shife: Being a gay superhero can't be all bad. At least I'd be well-dressed.

Darci: What are the odds?!? Well, according to Chud's analysis, we have a lot of shit to figure out, and I'm not talking about "zombie management," because I'm sure we both have a rock-solid knowledge base in that area.

Amy the Roommate: Take care of that roommate of your's. Board up the windows, just to make her feel better.

Chudly: You're right on the money to a point where I'm scared. While you were in my head, did you catch where I left my car keys?

ALL: The word verification just now was boxtuna. Tunabox would have been funnier, but still . . .

mysterygirl! said...

It's too bad that you weren't using the zombies to distract / imperil your current girlfriend while (dare I conjure up the early 90s and say) macking on a new lady. Because who would expect a zombie to make a good wingman? Certainly not this girl.

Steph said...

Damn those Zombies! I suggest you take a class in advanced Zombie killing.
Either that or just get magotted drunk every night. I'm pretty sure alcohol repels Zombies.

5 of 9er said...

Dreams are great subjects for blogs... since for some, it's the most exciting part of their lives. I've never had a dream about zombies... that would be way cool.
* Thanks for adding me to your roll. :)

NAME: Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Mystery: Yeah, zombies would make for crummy wingmen. I've had wingmen who were drunk to the point of a near-zombie status, and I know they were innefective.

Steph: Well, I don't know if getting drunk will keep them away, but it's worth at shot.

9'er: How could I not have a www.theliarsclub.blogspot.com person on my blog roll? After all, we have the same creepy guy checking out our cucumbers at our jewel

Ms Smack said...

oh bugger! I just wrote about a dream I had. You better not read it.

RevRee said...

Dr Ken, I would suggest some light reading "The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead"


This book is a key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now...

Matt said...

Best start sleeping with a shotgun under your pillow. Just in case.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

I'm responding to these three comments months later:

Smack: I'd gladly read your dream story, because you're a good writer. I just hate when uninteresting people talk about their uninteresting dreams.

Rev: Is that really a book? I could write that. One time in a dream I used the paper towel holder to jab into the head of one, which I thought was pure genius on my part.

Loaf: The shotgun could be good for the zombies, ex-girlfriends, and combinations there-of.