Monday, February 01, 2010

I've been trying to bulk up because I've always been kind of on the skinny side. Yeah, it's good to hear that I'm in good shape compared to some other people who are 33-years-old, but that's just not that great to hear, actually. So, I bought a bunch of weights on Craig's List from some German dude who had to go back to Germany, perhaps for the Scorpions farewell concert.

The funny thing about lifting weights is that you feel buff, so you're walking around all day like a hard ass, and then you look in the mirror, and you're the same scrawny puke you were before working out. It's frustrating. It also doesn't help (or maybe it does depending on how you look at it) that Gancey Girlfriend works out religiously along with Billy Blanks, and with her 5'10" long leg kicks and increasing muscle tone, it kind of looks like she could kick my ass if she needed to. That's not okay.

Because I watch so much mixed martial arts, I decided to use those guys as a model for how I want to look, because that's so realistic, so I found a guy who's my height (6'2"), and a reasonable weight to achieve (185). Here's the problem: Look at this guy!! I don't get how I can be so thin and weight 190, while Michael Bisping is five pounds lighter and totally ripped. I thought muscle weighed more than fat? If that's true, then this guy must have zero fat, and I'm like 70% body fat. This could be quite an uphill battle . . .

7 comments:

Kadonkadonk said...

I think that when I watch football too. A 6'2" wide receiver that is under 200 looks enormous!! And have you see Adrian Peterson?! Hot holy hell, if muscle weighs so much, how is he not 240 at least?!

Jenni said...

A.P needs to build more muscle in his hands...So he can hang onto the the ball. (Yes, I'm still pouting about our loss in New Orleans, but I still love him nonetheless.)

I was watching the Today show the other day and there was a segment about people being fat on the "inside" which I imagine is just God's way of getting back at people who are skinny.

Sister said...

Muscle doesn't weigh more than fat. A pound of feathers and a pound of lead are still both a pound. That is just something people who are heavy say to make excuses for why they are heavy.

JerseySjov said...

a pound of muscle has a lot less mass than a pound of fat, which is what i think you were going for. i'm densely muscular so i'm a lot heavier than i look.

also there's a visual difference between lean muscle and puffy jacked guy muscles.

what you gotta do is start pounding the lean protein and maintain a cardio routine while you weight train.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Donk: That's true. Football players are freaks, though. How can Warren Sapp have a huge belly and beat me in a 40-yard dash?

Jenni: Fat on the inside makes me feel disgusting. Thanks!

Sister: I thought of that, but would a sack full of muscle weight the same as a sack full of fat? Gross . . .

Jov: I do notice that when run when I'm weight training, it seems to be helping. What is lean protein? Is that like a quarter pounder instead of a Big Mac?

Mr. Shife said...

You are what you eat. A good workout is great but you need to implement the diet part as well. I have never been able to do that because I would rather have a burger or pizza instead of a grilled chicken breast and a cup of almonds. And this is first I am hearing about the Scorpions farewell concert. I might have to start selling some stuff of Craig's List as well.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Shife: I had pizza today because I needed a soda to stay up to do work, so I went to the pizza place to get a soda and got a couple slices. I actually don't know if there's a farewell concert, but I heard on the radio that they are calling it quits after like four decades. Sell the baby on Craig's List. That's wrong. Sorry!