Tuesday, March 07, 2006
The Robbery That Shook the Nation. Well, It Shook This Guy Anyway.
For those of you who don’t know me that well, I work in a school. Today some kid went into my office and stole my ipod. You have no idea how much this event has taken the wind out of my sails. I am simultaneously mad, sad, and disappointed.
I'm MAD for obvious reasons. I really would like to do an Andy Sipowitz style investigation in which I simply go student to student beating and black mailing information out of them until I get to the bottom of it. That would more than likely get me fired, so I think I’ll save the Sipowitz approach for another day, but believe me when I say that I really did consider it. I nearly stopped by Best Buy so that I could get the NYPD Blue box set for pointers on beat-downs and questioning styles to trip them up.
I’m SAD because this event will honest to God decrease my quality of life. This may sound like an exaggeration, but those of you who know me well know how important music is to me on an every day basis, and you know that this really isn’t a stretch. I listen to my ipod every day on the way to and from school. I just bought a freaking tape adapter for my car so that I can do so. You have no idea how annoyed I was on the ride home when I had to listen to the radio, knowing that I could be listening to one of my 4,500 favorite songs. Midway through a Bon Jovi song I had to shut the radio off and pound the dashboard a few dozen times. I also use it when I go running. I have a very short attention span, so most of my exercise is through sports, since running bores me. The only way I can make running seem halfway entertaining is to make bomb-ass play lists to keep my legs moving. This thief of a kid is going to make me fat! Okay, my blood is boiling right now. Give me a minute . . .
Okay, last but not least I am DISSAPOINTED. Whoever this kid is, he/she was more than likely visiting me at the end of the day, saw I wasn’t there, and took the ipod. I listen to these kids’ problems all day, I help them with every little aspect of their little lives, and sometimes I take their problems home with me to the point where their little lives are racing through my head when I’m trying to sleep, and this is the fricking thanks that I get. That is the hardest part about this whole thing.