Saturday, July 21, 2012

Guys Who Own Boats

My buddy was talking about a friend of his with a big ass whatever-foot boat with a plasma-whatever TV.  It got me thinking, what is it about girls and boats?  They pretend to be friends with dudes who have boats, and then there is there this is this weird dynamic where girls have to come with more friends and their bikinis to get on board.  Invites have nothing to do with personalities, and if you are a dude, you had better bring like eleven chicks.  It's so sad.  These guys with the boats are like the little boys who had a swimming pool as a kid - nobody likes him, but you used him to swim in that pool.  They still try to wield that power, not bothering cultivating a decent personality to get friends, just using that boat.  No thanks, buddy.  An afternoon with you on a boat means me trapped with you in a small space and your awful personality with nowhere to hide but overboard.

7 comments:

Michael5000 said...

I need to get me a boat.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Nah. You're an awesome dude so you don't need such a thing. I'd hang out with Michale 5000 on a beat up motor home.

Gorilla Bananas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gorilla Bananas said...

Remember Gary Hart and Monkey Business? Amazingly there's a Wikipedia entry for Monkey Business. Shows how big the whole yacht-bimbo thing is

sybil law said...

Hahahaha
That's my brother in law. He just bought a houseboat, and he's 40 years old, but he hangs out with 20 something chicks all the time and a bunch of older douchey guys. It really is how you said it is. My SIL was a Bengal cheerleader, and his requirement was that she bring her fellow cheerleaders. Ugh.

james douglas morrison said...

Great song!!! Boats N Hoes woulda been a good one for this post as well.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Gorilla: I understand Gary had some good ideas and a lot of potential, and then he's caught cheating with one hot chick and it all falls apart.

Sybil: God, I hope I'm not like that, but then again I'm 35 and kind of like that already.

jdm: This song is awesome. I started youtubing their stuff, and they're pretty good. I'm going record shopping . . .