. . . And I will give you advice that may or may not be horrible, but it will likely be funny. I never get email at that account, and I've managed to block all the penis growth ones, so now every time I check it says I have no mail. Not even the penis ones.
So, email me a dilemma that you have in your life, and I will provide you with sage-like advice based on my limited understanding of the use of common sense. And, of course, I won't use your real name.