Thursday, February 17, 2011

I was on a date with this girl, second date, and I'm going to keep this brief because I'm sleepy and it's a school night, and before she got there I was waiting to get a drink at the bar where this annoying guy was holding court with his poor unsuspecting friend, who was feeling the onslaught of horribleness. Sadly, I came in right at the start of an anecdote where he was saying that Faulkner was holding a lecture in his late seventies, and some guy asked where he gets inspired to write. According to this yahoo, Faulkner gave him some entirely sarcastic response about getting inspired every day around 1PM like clock work, at which time he has a shot of Bourbon and yada, yada, yada.

The whole while the guy with him is throwing in the occasional "yeah," "wow," and "okay," and then without missing a beat or giving the other guy a chance to change the subject, brutal guy says, "Faulkner was saying that he just worked harder than the other guys, he just wrote. It's like if you want to be the best guitar player ever, if you're like (some guy I've never heard of, and that's saying something because I know almost everyone worth a damn), you have to play like all the time. Now, let's say, with you, you want to be the best mixed martial artist . . . "

Now wait just a God damn minute. This guy is an MMA fighter? No wonder he's so damn bored with your Faulkner stories. Holy hell! This guy sucked butt.

However, the date went well. She's super funny and cool and smart. We'll see how it goes, but that guy . . . Yikes. What a doucher.

Good night.

7 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

Well, you've got to admire the MMA fighter's good manners in listening politely to that bore. Glad to hear it didn't spoil your date!

radioactive girl said...

Hooray for a second date with a funny cool girl. That's awesome!

I think some people just like to hear themselves talk. Yuck!

Scott Oglesby said...

There is something to it though… I keep telling myself that I’m going to write every day, no matter what but I always end up screwing it up. But when I’m able to go a couple weeks, writing every single day, it comes a thousand times easier. When I go a week without, the words just won’t come. Kind of like this comment, sorry!

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Gorilla: Yes, he did resist getting the asshole in a painful arm bar. I damn near did. I don't know how to do it, but I've seen it on TV.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Radio: Yes, hopefully it works out, but I texted her at 3AM last night, even though I was thinking at the time it was a dumb idea. It wasn't a booty call or anything, but too soon to be doing that. Oh well .. . .

Scott: You're so right, dude. It's easier when you stay in that mode. It's hard when you're hungover too. I need to get off the sauce, even if it worked for Faulkner. What kind of writing do you do?

Michael5000 said...

1PM seems like a funny time to get inspired for cock work. But hey! He was Faulkner! He was a genious!

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Michael: I did say COCK WORK! Hahhahahahahhahaha.

I'm editing that now . . . . . . . .