I was on a date with this girl, second date, and I'm going to keep this brief because I'm sleepy and it's a school night, and before she got there I was waiting to get a drink at the bar where this annoying guy was holding court with his poor unsuspecting friend, who was feeling the onslaught of horribleness. Sadly, I came in right at the start of an anecdote where he was saying that Faulkner was holding a lecture in his late seventies, and some guy asked where he gets inspired to write. According to this yahoo, Faulkner gave him some entirely sarcastic response about getting inspired every day around 1PM like clock work, at which time he has a shot of Bourbon and yada, yada, yada.

The whole while the guy with him is throwing in the occasional "yeah," "wow," and "okay," and then without missing a beat or giving the other guy a chance to change the subject, brutal guy says, "Faulkner was saying that he just worked harder than the other guys, he just wrote. It's like if you want to be the best guitar player ever, if you're like (some guy I've never heard of, and that's saying something because I know almost everyone worth a damn), you have to play like all the time. Now, let's say, with you, you want to be the best mixed martial artist . . . "

Now wait just a God damn minute. This guy is an MMA fighter? No wonder he's so damn bored with your Faulkner stories. Holy hell! This guy sucked butt.

However, the date went well. She's super funny and cool and smart. We'll see how it goes, but that guy . . . Yikes. What a doucher.

Good night.