One of Mrs. Noisewater's good friends from back in the Bay Area is a fun-loving guy like me. We spent the Thursday before the wedding with a big group of people at the Oakland A's game. It was less than 1/3 full in there and quiet. This guy and myself were easily the loudest people in the whole place. I distinctly remember looking around to find that my sister and all of my nephews had been gone for the remainder of the game. I asked my sister the next time I saw her if I was swearing or being offensive. She said, "No, you were being nice. You were just really loud." And so it was with this wedding guest and myself for most of that ballgame . . .
|(We also enjoyed a sparsely populated tailgate in the parking lot. This isn't us. These are less cool randoms off of Google Images)|
"Hey, Ken. Great party. I want to give you your gift right now (he hands me a folded up 100 dollar bill). This is what I always do at weddings. No, I didn't get you a card. You don't need a card, right? You'll get a ton of them! And I certainly didn't get you anything on your stupid registry. I don't even know where you're registered. Fuck your registry! You don't need any of that shit! Here's a hundred bucks. Do whatever you want with it. Spend it all tonight at the bar, put it up your nose (I think he meant like cocaine). I don't care! Anyway, like I said. Great party. Thanks for having me. See you around"
Anyway, have a good day, friends. And don't go putting your money up your nose.