My lady and I were at brunch the other day, and I looked up at her to see that her eyes were watering and she looked like she might be having a stroke.  She said the hot sauce was way, way too hot.  She started coughing and sweating, and I was getting a little worried.  I tried just a dab of the stuff, and yes, it was the hottest damn stuff ever.

The hot sauce came in a little metal dish, like the ones you get ketchup in.  It came with no explanation of what it was and how hot it was.  There was only one explanation: It must have been the infamous ghost pepper.

(I guess we should have suspected something when we saw this guy go back into the kitchen)

The waiter, in between apologies and delivering milk to her, said that it was, in fact, ghost pepper hot sauce.  Apparently some customers complained that the hot sauce was hot enough.  So the solution was to get the hottest stuff in the free world and hand it off to customers with no warning?  Seems like they could have dialed up the hotness slightly to make some people happy instead of waging secretive chemical warfare upon all the rest of their patrons.

What do you think?

I have some friends who were in town here in Chicago, and they were very excited to be able to spend some time together with their son staying with his grandparents. Apparently, the night before we saw them, they met some friends at Heaven on Seven, a Cajun restaurant that boasts hundreds of hot sauces. They got a little crazy with sampling some of the hotter ones, and later that night, despite the fact that they had washed their hands numerous times, he burned his wife's "you know what" with his fingers.

Moral of the story? If you're going to be using lots of hot sauce, skip the foreplay.

Moral of the story number two? If the hot sauce has the word "ass" in the title, Set it down; Don't even look at it.