Hooray! A New Gross Phrase . . .

My good friend, Big Business, and I just came up with a new fun phrase for the Urban Dictionary.  Big Business works terrible, terrible hours and raises his brother's two daughters, so I like to text back and forth with him a few times a day to make him laugh and keep him doing what he's doing.  I guess he does the same for me, come to think of it . . .

In any event, here it is:

1. The Pert (Plus) Spirt:
(n) When you squeeze the shampoo bottle right at climax to stimulate a monster load.

I damn near emptied the whole shampoo bottle with this morning's Pert Squirt! 
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Something wrong about using this pic, but whatever.  It's all wrong around here.

*It turns out there is already an urban dictionary definition for a pert squirt but it's stupid and doesn't make much sense.  All future additions should be approved by Big Business and the good Doctor . . . 

Today Was . . . Dry

Today was crap.  I screwed something up, defended myself as if I was right, then after a nap realized how stupid and wrong I was.  

But I will say this: I learned a new "hood word" on the West Side.  

Dry.

When you say someone is dry, it means that they have not been laid in a long while.

Example:

Quintel: Man, I've been hittin' it all week, son!

Keywan: No way, dawg.  You dry as hell.

So.  I'm an idiot, but on the bright side, I'm learning.