Sunday, February 13, 2011

I was at my sister's place today because she was helping me with my taxes, and at one point I was looking at my 3rd grade nephew's class picture (his name isn't really Colin).

Uncle Ken: This is a good pic of you, bud. And this is your teacher?

Colin: No, the blond one's my teacher. That's my principal.

Uncle Ken: She's your principal?! She's so young, and I don't want to weird you out, but she's kinda fine.

Colin: Okay . . .

Uncle Ken: Maybe you can get her number for me, yeah?

Colin: I don't think . . .

Uncle Ken: Here's what you do: first thing in the morning tomorrow, get in trouble, something bad enough to get sent to the principal. Then you tell her that you're sorry, but your uncle is a counselor, and he's been helping you with your behavior - and that's when you give her my number.

Colin: Okay, I'll get in trouble right away. I'll walk over to the teacher's desk and rub my butt on it (now squatting) and fart and say, "suck on that!"

Mom: Hey, stop saying that!

Colin and Uncle Ken: Sorry . . .

9 comments:

Andrew said...

Quit being creepy.

Though it is part of your "charm."

Just telling it like it is said...

He should have told her to pull his ginger he might have gotten away from it...I added you as well...thanks I am so flattered

Gorilla Bananas said...

Haha, what a cheeky little tyke! I don't believe he can fart at will though, only a few chimpanzees can do that.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Andrew: Yes. I gotta be me.

Just Telling: How'd you know my nephew is a ginger?

Gorilla: Yes. A man after your own heart. You'd be proud.

Michael5000 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michael5000 said...

As I have often told my sister, one of the chief responsibilities of an uncle is to set a bad example.

JerseySjov said...

"i'll rub my butt on it"
hell of a way to get in trouble! hilarious

Sister said...

Thanks a bunch. Thanks for teaching them to armpit fart too. You're the best. :)

Kenneth Noisewater said...

He did say he would rub his butt on her desk. That was all his idea. Great kid right there.