Thursday, March 04, 2010

Sometimes There Are Just Too Many Bad Omens to Ignore

Have you ever seen the Omen (1976)? It is the story of a little boy, Damien, who unbeknownst to his parents, is the son of the Devil. His father, played by the always stoic, and in this case stupidly so, Gregory Peck, who despite seeing numerous insanely scary events, refuses to believe that his boy is the spawn of Satan. Now, I know that this is not something that is easily accepted. I admit that I'm one of the biggest skeptics ever: I'm not sure I believe in anything, be they Gods, aliens, ghosts, or anything else not proven by science without some hard evidence. That being said, I think if I saw some of the crap this guy saw go down, I think I'd change my tune sooner than 3/4 of the way through the film. Here are some of the things he was able to look past:

Damien's Nanny, at his birthday party, hung herself in front of everyone, saying, "I did it all for you, Damien," or something like that.

Damien intentionally ran his big wheel into his mom while she was fiddling with a hanging plant, knocking her off the balcony, killing her unborn child, the very child some priest told the father Damien would try to kill, and oh yeah, that priest knew she was pregnant before anyone else did.

That same priest also had a metal rod go right through his body during an electrical storm, killing him and skewering him while he was still standing, which is how the father saw him on front page news. Would a paper really publish something so gruesome?

They took Damien to one of those drive-through zoos, and after delivering just one creepy smile at them, all of the chimps went bananas and started screeching and jumping all over the car.

Another day, they tried to take him to a church, and Damien started panicking as they were pulling up. They said, "It's just a church, Damien." When they stopped the car in front, and it was clear to him that he would be going there, Damien started punching and clawing at his mother, bruising her badly with no apparent punishment.

Here's the one I really don't like: After their last nanny hung herself, a new one showed up before they even started looking for a replacement. She is obviously an unnerving woman and a Satan worshipper, and she brought a giant scary Rottweiler to protect Damien. Gregory Peck is all nonchalant about it, like, "Hey, I thought I told you to get rid of that dog." This woman is clearly a nut job. Fire the bitch!

In any event, I had to take a sick day today, and I was just lying on the couch this afternoon getting pissed about this guy looking past all of these things. Is there a movie you can think of where a character is a skeptic for far too long into the film, and don't say George Bailey in It's a Wonderful Life because that movie is perfect.


Anonymous said...

Oh man I remember Omen. That shit really was creepy. I can't think of any movies that pissed me off like that but I'm sure there are a few. I'm just thinking about Omen a lot now... especially that scene where the nanny hangs herself. Yeah that dad was stupid!

Heff said...

Clark Grizwald. He should have known cousin Eddie was a motherfucker from the get-go.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Blame: Yeah, come on, dad! Get your head out of your ass!

Heff: Oh, he knew he was a fucker. He just had to play nice with the in-laws. I love when Eddie offers him a beer, and then gives him the half-finished one, and opens up another one in the sixer, leaving the plastic rings on. Pimp!