Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Usually Jim Was Drunk, But Sometimes He Was Right

With these earth quakes

radiation scares causing Japanese zombies and the creation of a for-real Godzilla
(I have no proof of this. Yet)

The Bachelor picking women to marry like the NCAA Tournament

Ultimate Fighting fighters kneeing each other in the face spraying blood everywhere and dudes have to mop up the blood between fights

Mike Tyson has a show about pigeons on the Animal Planet

Youtube idiots becoming famous for being complete morons

A Bieber Fever outbreak

and a new Moutain Dew flavor and a new form of taco from Taco Bell every few weeks . . . it all makes me think that maybe the whole shit house is going up in flames.

What other signs of the Apocalypse have you seen, Seven Readers, that make you want to bring a bunch jars into your bomb shelter to pee in for the next 20 years or so?


Aubree said...

i don't think the world is going to end in 2012. i mean, who predicted that, some random mayans? what do they know about anything!

but i digress. and bieber fever sounds like a disease (and yet, is it not?)

Gorilla Bananas said...

"You're Japan and I'm Godzilla!" Do you know which film that line is from?

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Bree: Bieber Fever is actually what killed the Mayans. Spain brought it over. F'd them up.

Gorilla: I do not. Damn it! I wasn't expecting a pop quiz . . .

Radioactive Tori said...

I had a real comment to leave here but now that I am laughing about your response to Gorilla I can't even remember it.

I think I was going to say something about the bachelor and how sad I was that the girl he chose came off as kind of cold/mean/kind of a bitch. Either that or something about how I'm scared about the radiation because I think the pill people would take to avoid the poisoning is iodine based which wouldn't help me since I have no thyroid. I think I'd be screwed.

tnobes said...

Well Mooj, if all else fails, we can still whip the horses eyes, and make them sleep, and cry.

Mr. Shife said...

You have covered most of the them but I think that Adam Sandler is still able to produce absolute cinematic garbage that becomes the top film in America is a sign. Or that I now shop at JC Penney for clothes. Or that I watch Elmo more than anything else. Or that I am getting closer to buying matching track suits for me and the wife.

Scott Oglesby said...

Honestly, I think the apocalypse is nigh because I want it to be. I want to be one of the only ones left on earth. Gas would be cheap and I could just, like, walk into a pharmacy and take whatever I wanted.

And if all the religious nuts really did get raptured, most of the assholes would be gone and life would be…. rapturous.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Radio: Yeah, that blond really is a cold, boring broad. He should have chose the nice girl with the big knockers, even if she was a little immature.

Nobes; Yes! Whip them eyes! Good old Jimbo . . .

Shife: I just laughed out loud three times.

Scott: I can just see your family and everyone else blowing up, and you go, "Sweet! I'm going to get some gas and go to Wallgreens!!"