Monday, October 17, 2011

Very Superstitious Plumbers

I have this friend, I'm going to call him Plumber, and every time he comes out to the bars with me, he gets lucky with the ladies. He's a good looking guy, but I think when I'm out with him I force him to be more social because he can be shy. I'm fearless out there because I have a girlfriend, so what the hell do I care, right?

So, he had gone home with girls 2 straight times when he went out with me going into Saturday's outing. We were having a burger cook off at my place, and then the second we stepped out into the alley to go to the bars, the neighbor girls, who I don't even know, hollered at us to come join them on their garage deck. I thought it was unsafe move on their part, but luckily for them, Plumber and I are not rapists. We mingled with them for a while, one seemed interested in Plumber, he got her number, and she's been blowing him up ever since.

Then at the karaoke spot, we met a number of women. One had a tight dress that looked like tin foil, like a baked potato, but she wasn't very cool. Then another girl thought I was an MMA fighter, I think because she has seen me in the bar with my friend, Gung Ho who trains. I was too drunk to be clever enough to lie. Then there was a pair of girls we were chatting up, and while I ran interference on the not pretty one, at some point Plumber had a barroom make out deal with the pretty one. Boom!

You ever get superstitious about things when you were single?

I know there were certain shirts I was convinced were vagina deterrents, and I'd never wear them out. Some bars I would go to I would see friends having success, but I'd be like a damn leper in the joint. Then other shirts and other bars would be really consistent for me.

Anyone have anything along these lines they'd like to share?


sybil law said...

I'm a girl. Chances are, I could get laid in a monk house. (A monastery?) However, being a girl, if I'm not comfortable with what I'm wearing, then my confidence isn't there, and... no. Either way, I *could* get laid.

Gorilla Bananas said...

I think you've got to have the right body scent for the girl in question. It would save time if all the men threw their t-shirts into a basket and let the girls sniff out the one they liked.

Heff said...

"Plumber", huh ?

What's his LAST name, BUTT ?

CurlyKateMcGee said...

Guys who don't hit on me are the guys I am interested in. If a guy hits on me, or is trying to hard, I get skeeved. My friends eve have stories about the guys I torture that have hit on me. I have never even considered dating a guy if he hits on me because that means he is hitting on other girls in the bars when we are dating (in my head at least). The Shy guy sounds like shy is working for him. Actually what is his number :)

And Sybil has a great point.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Sybil: Yes. Girls got it easier in that department for sure. But I hear you about the wearing the right thing, so I think we're on the same page all around.

Gorilla: I like this though! Saves everyone a lot of time and money!

Heff: My names for friends when I talk about them on the blog always have some odd connection to their name or their personality. This one . . . I can't say, but he's a good dude.

Curly: The trick is being talking to women casually like you're not coming onto them, and having that hint of shyness/humility. It's a tightrope . . .