Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Had Another Weird Team Workout . . .

. . . at the same gym as my other post, and this time it was doing a series of exercises with what can only be described an over-sized, weighted, foam billy club with a knob on the end. The instructor had what you expect in an aerobics lady: She was athletic and spunky. But then I started getting glimpses again of why this gym is super weird.

The other four in the group were regulars, so they all evidently get weekly updates about the instructor's upcoming wedding as she leads us. Here are the details from today's session:

- She can't wear her mother's dress as planned because, as it turns out, her mother was 93 pounds when she got married (Instructor can't weight a whole lot more than 100, but she has muscles and a big, muscley butt.

- Also, the dress was losing its luster. However! Not to fear because she's going to surprise her wedding party with mom wedding dress handbags and use it to make her garter. That's actually kind of an awesome idea.

- She's taking a picture in front of Wrigley Field wither her husband to give to her mentally challenged sister who is a savant about Chicago Cubs facts. That's actually kind of sweet.

Okay, I guess I'm not really making fun of this chick. Sorry. I'm just used to that approach on this blog, but I'm more tolerant of people these days. I just find what's fun or interesting about them even if it's a little weird or annoying.

For instance . . .

At one point she told us that at the gym she used to work out at, there was Sexual Harassment Fridays, where all verbal harassment (no touchy!) was fair game. Apparently, even the customers knew about this, and Friday, despite usually being one of their slower days, became one of the busiest!

That's actually a terrific idea - if you had the right staff who knew how to be sleazy funny in a tongue-in-cheek way, like Larry on Three's Company. Come to think of it, most personal trainers kind of have a Larry vibe.

Anyway, I'm kind of thinking about signing up for a membership at this joint after all my free sessions, if for no better reasons than the funny stories and the potential harassment.


Heff said...

You're signing up to stare at the T&A. Admit it.

sista said...

As an employment lawyer, I will not be asking you to refer this gym to me as a potential client. Actually, maybe I should. I would constantly have work!

JerseySjov said...

"weighted foam billy club with a knot on the end"
i have no idea what you're talking about. the closest thing i can think of is the shake weight.

also i find it funny that you're losing your snark... sarcastically making fun of people who are actually quite nice is a young person's game ;)

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Heff: There's not that much T & A there to be honest. Well, the instructor had an A, I suppose.

Sista: Yeah. They'd keep you really busy for sure.

Jov: Don't know what you call the thing, but it works. Yeah, I'm losing the snark for sure. I've jumped the snark.

Mr. Shife said...

Jump the snark, eh? You just need a run-in with Justin Beiber fans and I am sure you will be right back in the snarkness. Good luck at the gym.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Shife: Whenever I hear people on the radio talking about kids catching Bieber Fevor, it sounds a little too much like Beaver Fevor, whic is not something I want to hear about 11-year-olds.