Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Two Things That Happened in Tha Hood and One in My Hood

1. Today, while working in an all Black classroom, a bunch of kids were coughing, and I told everyone that whenever that happens, I instinctually look around the room for some hand sanitizer. Another teacher, also Black, said, "The day I get that paranoid, my fat butt is just staying home." I'm sure she would have said ass if there weren't a bunch of second and third graders writing numbers backwards in the room at the time. For the record, I am that paranoid; my skinny white butt hates being sick.

2. In the same school, a teacher was asking her students what problem the Three Bears had in the story of Goldiocks and the Seven Bears, and one delightful young man said, "Goldilocks busted in they* house and started taking all their stuff . . ." So true, and you know what I was thinking? How is there no lesson to be learned in that story? She gets away with taking whatever she wants in someone's home not her own, they bust her, but she just runs out of the house, getting away with it! Can someone tell me the point? Shouldn't the Bears make her their slave or something?

3. As I was running today, I was thinking about Ugg boots and how they look foxy on chicks. Then I was thinking how I also like big boobs. So, why has there been no Uggs and Juggs campaign? I just googled it: nothing.** I should contact the Uggs people and tell them I could shoot the calendar with my limited camera experience free of charge. I get the best ideas when I run . . .

As for comments today, how about telling me where you do your best thinking? I know mine is jogging for sure, some would say on the can, but how about you?

*This grammatical error is actually how he said it, and it's one of my favorites.

**Evidently someone did think of it, as this looks to be some kind of theme party or something that I found on Myspace when I was looking for pictures. Damn it!


JerseySjov said...

i get good idears all the time. im pretty sharp like that.
do we get extra credit if we do more than just answer the question? haha

1. im actually kind of hoping that i get swine flu this semester, since my school has a new policy regarding h1n1 stating that if you get it, you must remain in your residence until you're all better and youre exempt from any coursework you miss.

2. she probably does get eaten in the original version of the story, or at least roughed up some. you know how those old school fairy tales are always more hardcore than the modern retellings.

3. uggs are disgusting. i dont understand the appeal of girls looking like they inside-outed two lambs for their footwear.
what exactly would uggs and juggs promote?

BeckEye said...

I'm not sure where I do my best thinking. When I come up with a good thought, I'll let you know.

And re: your Seth Rogen conference call question - yeah, those call and interview offers usually go pretty quickly. I usually can't do them anyway since most of them are in the day while I'm at work.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Jov: Good luck catching the pig flu, you're probably right about the original tale being more grim, and the calendar would promote woodies.

Beck: That is TOTAL BS! The first person that wrote back got to email Seth Rogan? It could have been some dumb-dumb! Ugh!

radioactive girl said...

My son and I had swine flu last year before it was the "in" disease to have. I always miss the trends!

As for thinking, I do my best thinking while running or swimming. Since surgery I haven't been able to do either, which explains why this comment is so dumb.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Running is easily my best thinking time. I'd do it today if I didn't have so much shit to do.