Thursday, November 25, 2010

The Frisky Cabbie

Something about me leads people to believe that they can tell me very random and revealing things about themselves, and I wish I knew what it is I was doing to illicit this because I would cease it instantly.

The other day my cab driver (I couldn't place his accent, but he was Caucasian in appearance)and I were exchanging a pleasant conversation, and then it took a turn for the . . . odd.

Dr. Ken: Are you married, Cabbie?

Cabbie: Yeah, 20 years now. Good woman. Good pussy, too.

D.K.: Oh. Congrats.

Cabbie: Yes, I'm 49 and she's 50. I think women get hornier as they get older.

D.K.: That's entirely possible. I haven't dabbled in women quite that long in the tooth. Yet.
Cabbie: Yeah, she's always wanting to have sex. I have to take Viagra to keep up. Have you tried Viagra?
D.K.: Not quite yet. How's it working for you?

Cabbie: It's great! I take one right near the end of my shift, and then I take another right when I get home. Then I'm ready to go, and the next morning, we can do it again!

D.K.: That's fabulous, Cabbie. You ever get one of those woodies that lasts for over four hours?

Cabbie: No.
D.K.: That's good. I don't imagine that's very . . . comfortable. This is my stop.

Cabbie: Okay, buddy. Try that Viagra!

D.K.: I just might. Give my best to The Mrs. You going to pop some pills and rock her world tonight?

Cabbie: You know it!
Have you ever had a situation like that? How do people get a sense that I'm not easily offended, and in fact, welcome perverted conversations? How about you, Seven Readers? Do you ever run into people telling you goofy stuff like this?


Gorilla Bananas said...

When you asked him if he was married, he naturally thought you were interested in his wife's sexual appetite. Why else would you ask the question? If the cabbie were from Albania, he might have asked you if you wanted to fuck his wife for 100 dollars.

bschooled said...

If I had a nickel...

I honestly don't know what's funnier...Creepy McCabberson, or what you said about not yet having dabbled in women who are "long in the tooth".

Alpha Za said...

haha, you get the most interest conversations with Cabbies and Bar tenders. Strippers have fun minds too.

I agree with Gorilla, he makes a valid point. Get your Cultural Sensitivity on Doc!

Just telling it like it is said...

OMG that happens to me too...I tell people I'm a nurse and their clothes fall off...WTF?

Heff said...

Call HBO and get yourself a spot on the next "Taxi-Cab Confessions".

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Gorilla: You're right. I guess that's what I WAS asking him. It was the winking and nudging I was doing. I'm putting you into the "Frequent Flyer" section in my blogroll cause you've been making very regular stops. I'm going to swing over to your tree right now and comment over there.

bschooled: Yes. I've been told I'm an "old soul" cause I say lots of old man stuff. Awesomely.

Alpha: Thanks for coming by! The strippers are interesting without a doubt, but I often worry about their emotional well being, even though they make much more money than me.

Just Telling: I'm a nurse . . . Did it work?

Heff: I'd kill on that show. Actually, I killed on the rickshaw - if only I had a camera . . .

Andrew said...

The same thing happens to me. Random people I've never spoken to will tell me about their marital problems, sex life, work troubles, illnesses, etc. It's good to know that people trust me but gets old very easily.

Luckily no one has told me about their Viagra habits.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Andrew: Maybe that's why we're therapists. ; )

Athena said...

I have people tell me much more information than I ever asked for regularly.

In my family, it's known as "Karen-face" -- Karen being my mother, who apparently has one of those faces that people inherently trust, and thus, spill all their most intimate secrets to, and often.

Unfortunately (or fortunately for dinner party conversation), I look like my mother.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Athena: Yeah, I got the Karen-Face big time. People tell me whacked out stuff. Then again, I often bring up whacked out stuff.